Marc

I mainly read Goon on and off now. 

I do buy some IDW, Dynamite, Valiant, Image, or Top Cow digital comics bundles on Groupies or Humble Bundle. I'm not saying I always love 'em but it's a weird grab bag of new creator owned stuff, Astro-City-esque retreads or pardody of golden age stuff, public domain classics, or odd licensed stuff like Alice Cooper.

I watch the DC cartoons as they come out but the New 52-esque stuff is not holding my attention. Not sure how I feel about all the retreads like Judas Contract only with young Blue Beetle or Killing Joke, or DKR.

Marvel comics has been truly ridiculous for a long long time now. It's way beyond flailing and into the depths of ironic Hipster pastiche garbage. It's so bad that I still try to get mileage out of the idea that for any character there is a kewler "red" version waiting in the wings who can of course be best debuted by having them easily beat up the original character's dark-twin nemesis or evil universe duplicate. 

Yeah, Red Son of Satan can easily beat up Satan w/ Dormammu riding on his shoulders for a chicken fight. And he has SPIKES, yo. So kewl. I hear that Mesphisto pays him protection money in the currency of Spider-man marriages revoked by demonic pacts. Why in one issue Red Son of Satan beats Belasco with his long-missing arm, just for worshiping the old ones too loud. Oh and you want shock? You want references? On page 14 there's a picture of the High Evolutionary barbecuing Bova the Cow woman. Sure. Only $4 and every issue is a #1 because Marvel reboots it JUST THAT OFTEN. Be sure to get all 13 red chrome variant covers every month! 1 in 100 random issues will have some left over vintage 70's KISS blood in the ink. None of that cheap Vinny Vincent stuff. Just Gene, Ace, Peter, and Paul. Mostly Gene. He's a bit of a bleeder, that guy. We never thought we'd get the scab to stay. Good sport though!

What about Crystal Gayle? Does Red Crystal Gayle sing better than the original? OF COURSE! And her hair is longer and shinier and it's RED.

Red Red Sonja is so amazing that we just aren't ready yet. We'd foam at the mouth and forget our own names. Rumor is that she single handedly ended the Hyborian Age, oh Prince! Because they all owed her money. Nothing personal. So kewl!

My nickel's worth is that If Marvel wants to do 'Nazis won the war' then they need to slap 'What If' on the cover or else do that over in their gritty hardcore "Ultimate feat. Marvel zombies" ghetto.

Here's an idea for a new crossover mini-series thing:

WHAT IF: NICK SPENCER'S EDITORS ACTUALLY GAVE A DAMN ABOUT MARVEL COMIC'S PAST PRESENT AND FUTURE ?

I've read elsewhere that some fans are arguing that people are "jumping the gun" critiquing this "Secret Empire" storyline before it plays out entirely.

Someone wrote that there are actually two possible realities to this story and we dont know which is real yet. The exposition at the beginning of the issue tells us that the Cosmic Cube was used to implant these thoughts and memories into Cap's head.

Maybe it's just the execution that's upsetting to us ol' time readers. (Still, not interested.)

-C!

I don't judge anyone for jumping the gun, so to speak. After all, I'm not waiting for the Trump presidency to play out entirely as some would ask us to do.

That said, I have been more interested in the last couple of years of Marvel than I had in the decade or so before. And this isn't making me enjoy any of my old comics any less. 

I think it's pretty obvious they just keep throwing stuff against the wall knowing they can take advantage of the lifers who just keep buying for the sake of keeping their collections going. Eventually that's going to break.

It doesn't bother me, since I no longer buy floppies. However, I feel bad for a current reader who is forced to accept a gimmick-driven (my call, of course) 'status quo' for years (thank you, decompressed storytelling, ugh), until the latest epic peters out.

*****

I think it's a reflex. Anyone who's been reading comics longer than 5 years groans when something like this happens because they know exactly what the deal is.