Berman-era spin-offs had a twisted concept of Vulcans in general, making them a race of uptight, dishonest, knuckle-rapping nuns. While the franchise was falling all over itself for years to offer up love to the Klingons, it ran the Vulcans into the mud, offering an olive branch only at the very end of it all in Enterprise Season 4. Berman era writers just did not get the concept of that world, and seemed to have a genuine resentment of Spock and his people. The only good Vulcans were the ones who turned their back on their homeworld and its teachings. If you were lucky, the best you could hope for was to be nondescript like cigar-store figure Tuvok or Dr. Selar in her embarrassing polyester wig and oversize ears.
|Posted: 01 February 2018 at 1:43am | IP Logged | 6
The idea that we were uncivilized children the Vulcans were keeping locked inside their playpen and wouldn't allow out to mix with the more advanced, Warp 5 civilizations, like the Pakleds, was dramatically uninspiring, leading to pathetic speeches from our characters pleading that they were big enough and smart enough to come out and play with the other kids. Bakula's story arc throughout the first few seasons involved repeated "Aw, c'mon! S'not fair!" footstamping tantrums, all delivered with the power of a routine telegram being read to its recipient by the postal worker Enterprise crew members so closely resembled.
The show was tepid and ill-conceived at every turn. We're five days away from the Klingon homeworld at warp five? Not just Klingon territory, but the homeworld itself? And the Klingons have Warp Five technology already and have had it for years? Why aren't we a Klingon outpost already? Do they only conquer races four days away?
Bakula didn't earn his commission as Captain. He was the kid of the guy who built the ship. T'Pol, the dangerous spy in our midst, who might betray us to her superiors at any moment, forswore her Vulcan responsibilities in the first story arc, and told her bosses she wouldn't do as she was told because, well, she liked humans. So there. Tucker was an annoying sop to Southern viewers, too young for his job, whose performance came down to a single approach to line readings. Come rain or shine, happiness or sorrow, that guy read his line with the same inflections he would all the others he'd ever been given, and damned if he wouldn't read the next one the same way. His romantic chemistry with T'Pol on a scale from one to five registered at about point two-zero, still putting him ahead of Bakula's negative numbers.
Really? No one could get excited by this woman? Are postal workers actually this dull?
The whole "Let us out of our sandbox! Waaah!" set-up did the franchise no credit, especially since we knew that very soon, the entire Federation was going to be centrally located on this backwards, no-account, child-planet. The obvious way out of this numb, non-starter story construct, being the first civilization anywhere to build a Warp Seven engine in a Warp Five universe, never occurred to anyone or was struck down by the repressive Berman regime. If you can exponentially go that much farther, that much faster than everyone else then yes, you can get to the Klingon homeworld, or at least Klingon space from a previously safe distance away (although five days still seems ridiculous.) If you're the first Warp Seven civilization, the universe comes knocking at your door. You can thumb your nose at your schoolmarms as you fly past them out the door.
Nope. Warp Five. Same as everyone else. Same as the Pakleds, who came up with it first. Archer's dad doesn't seem too bright in this company. Neither do the writers.
And no, Voyager was no better. Not in it's early Neelix, the breakfast cereal mascot, phase and not in it's retrograde years as an overlong sitcom starring Seven and the Doctor in their wacky adventures as the only crewmembers who can't be knocked out by this week's space anomaly.
Similar self-sabotage to any concept of drama and an overwhelming dedication to the "God, isn't she perfect?" Janeway agenda photon torpedoed Voyager from the start. Janeway's like every other hero, you say? Could there be an "Enemy Within" episode featuring the character? Wouldn't you just get Janeway and Janeway-with-a-slight-headache? Could you do a story where she'd consider for a second allowing Depression-era Eddie Keeler to live if it meant the loss of her ship and the future? Actual heroes have flaws, even if only minor ones, that they must overcome. What's Janeway's? The fact that she has terrible taste in fiction? Are we to believe that it's that she suffers from her terrible dedication to absolute bristol-fashion, spit-and-polish niftiness? If so, I didn't see it, and I watched far too much of this show to believe they could pull even that off.
Edited by Brian Hague on 01 February 2018 at 3:58am